Ooh Chile! It was high time for a chit chat about the dating scene in 2021. Is it as ghetto as it seems on social media? Are we still blaming Coronavirus? Listen to this week’s podcast episode here!
It seems like people are literally just dating to post it on social media. Dating as in getting to know someone, going on dates and making it official. It starts in the DM’s, then the first date pressures then the time frame before making it official. If the DM seems post worthy for a good laugh, a meme or 15 seconds of fame, you can rest assured that a screenshot of it will find its way to a Shade Room type of page’s post. If the first date is not perfect, it’s blasted on social media. Lastly, if all goes well from start to finish, it’s posted on social media in a force fed fashion and if the relationship doesn’t last, we’re all left wondering what happened.
Tik Tok has brought a few dating horrors to the conversation table. There’s a trend, well seemingly a trend, of men flipping the script. They are not spending their hard earned $40 on a date if the woman is not putting out at the end of the night. So they are opting for dinner at their house or no date at all. If they make it out to eat, they’ll go Dutch when the bill comes.
I missed the memo on all of this and thankfully so. I can’t even begin to think about what I would do if the man who asked me out on a date, decided to eat 75% of his food then sent it back and had it taken off of the bill. Then tells me that I have to pay my portion because he didn’t eat anything. Like, what?!! Or even if the man brings a friend on the date and then runs out on the bill? Like what?!?!?
Let’s not get it twisted, men and women have been cutting up for years. Since the beginning of time we’ve been on some BS. Women wanting free meals and not actually liking the person they are going on dates with. Men only wanting to have sex, not even caring to know last names, etc. Since we know that we have been trash, what’s the excuse now? Is it a new generation thing? Is there hope for the dating future?
P.s. I know that all of the dating scene hasn’t been bad. I know that there are success stories out there. I pray that those and other relationships start/continue to flourish. Happy dating!
March 9, 2017 was when I posted part one. I have posted many other blog posts and podcast episodes since then on how to save but part one has been the most popular. Since then, I have tweaked a few things. While writing this post I went back and read that post, I see that I will have to revisit a thing or two. I hope that part two will be as short and to the point as the first.
A lot has changed in 4 years. Mostly everything is digital now. This could make it easier or harder for some people to save. No worries, I hope my suggestions will help you out. First things first,
Open a savings account if you don’t have one already. Try to find an account that is high interest yielding (An account that will pay you a higher interest rate than a normal savings account for your money sitting in the bank).
Do an evaluation of your finances so that you’ll know realistically how much you can potentially save. (Calculate your income minus your bills, to determine how much is left over)
Set a goal. (Try to save $100 for the week, pay period or month)
Try doing a money challenge to get your savings ball rolling. (i.e. 52 week money challenge or $5 challenge)
Cut out unnecessary spending. (Take a break from coffee shops, fast food restaurants, shopping for a while)
Search online for class action lawsuits that may have affected you or unclaimed funds from the Treasury dept. (Once you get the check, put it into your savings account)
Fill out surveys or utilize cash back websites when shopping online. (They pay you for referrals also like Rakuten)
Redeem your cash back points for cash from your credit cards. (7,000 points could equate $50-$70cash depending on the company)
Transfer small amounts into your savings account randomly. (If your account has $443.76, transfer $3.76 or 43.76 into savings. Do that weekly or as often as you check your account.)
Use coupons when shopping for necessities (Put the amount you saved into your savings account. If using coupons caused you to save $15.88, put that amount into savings).
Put any change that’s laying around the house or in piggy banks/coke bottles (large amounts i.e. $50 worth) into the bank. (Cash them out at the coin machine and deposit the money into your savings account.)
Sell old clothes and/or shoes to a consignment shop or online and use the money you made to add to your savings account.
Don’t be afraid to ask for monetary gifts for special events instead of gifts. (This unexpected money goes into savings)
Use the interest that you’ve earned on your savings account to achieve any additional money goals or to pay down debt.
Saving small is still saving. Don’t despise meager beginnings. These small gestures will create bigger gestures until saving is no longer foreign but a lifestyle for you. Check out my podcast, YouTube channel and other blog posts for even more savings tips.
” In the fall, I usually host a business seminar and the audience is always eager and ready to make their mark. As the instructor, I am always ready to assist in this part of their business journey. As I walk in, I scan the room to see who’s here and what demeanor they’re giving off. I began by checking the registration list to see if the room matches the list. As I called the names out, I purposely made eye contact with each person in order to get name and faces together. I got towards the end of the list I noticed a woman we shall refer to as First Row Third Seat.
She seemed a bit shy but something about her said that she’s here on purpose. Little did I know, she would shed that shyness in the later weeks of the seminar. As the weeks pass by, First Row Third Seat opens up a bit more each week. Conversations after the lectures are brief but seemingly calculated. I wondered to myself, is it the purposely calling on her during the lecture or was there some other motive.
Conversations towards the end of seminar, shifted to activities outside of the lectures. We discussed some nightlife spots that could be enjoyed. Never once did it occur to me that I could run into her at any of the spots but again the shyness was disappearing and more comfort was being established. What occurred next really caused me to pay attention for the rest of the seminar. In walks First Row Third Seat, not like all of the other times I found her in class, slumped down in her chair trying not to be noticed. This time, she was in white jeans, a nice blazer and heels that made me pay more attention than I had ever before. Now you must understand that I couldn’t be obvious but I noticed everything from head to toe. She shared that after class that she had an engagement to attend. From this time forward she seem to be a natural in all of her interaction with me. Shyness was nowhere to be found.
The seminar was coming to a close and First Row Third Seat was still all smiles yet more and more she seemed comfortable interacting with me after each lecture. She reveals she needed to speak with me but not in the current setting. I would be naïve if I said I didn’t know what the conversation could be about but I decided not to assume anything or fill in the blanks for her. I suggested that we get together for drinks to discuss what was on her mind. We meet for drinks and for the second time since I have known her; her attire is eye catching. Only this time, there was no need to be reserved. I can really examine her from head to toe without worrying about it looking inappropriate. Her dress hugged all of the curves I had seen in those white jeans but this selection was by far her best selection to date. Unlike during the seminars, I was able to receive a hug that set the tone for the evening. I ordered drinks to lighten the mood so that the conversation and time spent could flow naturally. After ordering drinks, I simply couldn’t keep my eyes off her. I was hoping that I wasn’t making her feel uncomfortable with my purposeful stares. This lady had such beauty and class about herself, I couldn’t help but to admire her. This was not the woman that I saw at the beginning of the seminar. She was good at hiding all that she had to offer but I was even better at reading what she was hiding. Finally, I interrupt the purposeful stares and I ask First Row Third Seat what would you like me to know? She says, “you maintain eye contact with each of your attendees and I find it very sexy”. She also mentions that she finds me attractive. My response to her is, “Oh really?” She eagerly responds with a sexy and inviting “Yes.”
By this time, I really can’t keep my eyes off of her. Everything about her stands out from her beautiful slanted eyes to her mesmerizing smile. Very alluring yet subtly giving you just enough to cause you to want more servings of what she is serving. We are now in our comfort zone with more drinks on tap. We are closer than ever before. Her invites are classy and very calculated. My acceptance to her invites are purposeful with the intent to stay near for the rest of the night. We have company at the bar but my focus is on her. The closer I get the better the conversation becomes. I whisper soothing words in her lovely ears and her body tells me she is agreeing to my touch. I see the way she responds. Mentally she’s telling me to give her more and mentally I oblige.
Our company takes notice as soothing words escape First Row Third Seat with a luscious volume. Finally she has to excuse herself to regain composure because of the music we mentally created together. As she excuses herself I can’t help but to stare as she walked away. My mind is made up to continue on this journey to see more of what she had been successful at hiding. I can still smell her scent and definitely her mental aroma that had been oozing out since we hugged. She’s back but we really were just getting started. We both look at one another and we mentally connect as if we had never lost connection. It can be said that all good things must come to an end however we haven’t even started. Without saying it, we agreed to see one another again because clearly we had too much company, even though we were able to phase them out and make mental music.
We leave and I walk this ambitious, beautiful, calculated, confident, determined and everything you’d want in a woman, to her car. I remember her speaking briefly about PDA but I knew that I wouldn’t participate in that tonight. Nah, I wanted to continue and I thought PDA would ruin that. No, this woman was going to be respected tonight. There would be another time for that. So with no fanfare, a forehead kiss is placed above her pretty eyebrows. This seems to confuse her but her hug says next time will be different. The message conveyed to her is your mysterious and calculated approach will be respected and your comfort is important to me.
I call her and we have small talk until she makes it home but I can’t take my mind off of what her body said all night. Pull me close it whispered. I anticipated the next time by counting down the time. I had been intrigued by her mysteriousness since those white jeans and then the black dress was the signature invite I was going to use to get invited to this mental engagement. She makes it home safely and we say our good nights.
All I can say is Damn….. You never know. “
This was a fire read! Now I can’t wait to write another DAMN story. LOL!
**** This is a submission from a Sincerely Angie subscriber that was sent back in 2019. I am just getting around to posting it. If you would like to submit a blog post for the DAMN series, send a message through the contact page. ****